16 May, 2007

Workplace Performance

Yesterday LSS had to supervise a table of excitable 7 year olds as they attempted to fashion an Egyptian sarcophagus out of cardboard and sticky tape. He said the top 10% listened to the instruction once: "ok, I measure from here to here, then cut out the template? Done"; the middle 80% got the gist but kept on coming back with questions like, "I've done this wrong, what do I rub it out with? Oh, a rubber? OK"; and the bottom 10% were, like, "Pencil? what's that? where am I? what's my name? will someone tell me what is going on, for the love of God?"

The top performer was a girl called Felicia, who frankly, I am ready to hire right now. Was she by any chance Chinese, I asked? Of course she was. This is no different from my workplace, where, globally, Asia-Pacific gets everything done, materially correct, and on time, while everybody else argues and hires consultants and drops their rulers (Latam) and pisses off for lunch (France).

8 Comments:

Blogger Tiny said...

Earlier this evening, I had to call the customer service of an Asia-based company. I was very frustrated but the staff stayed calm and helped me to sort out my problem patiently. I found out that the call centre is actually located in Hong Kong (I dialled a toll-free number and had no idea where the call centre is). If I were to call the local customer service here, they would probably give me the "Do I really care about your problems?" attitude.

4:14 am  
Blogger Songshards said...

Ooops Phiz - you forgot your live and learnski rule.

4:43 am  
Blogger FBT said...

yes, live and don't learn, that's me

5:31 am  
Blogger hugh said...

You can't beat a Chinese kid. My 10 year old - she qualifies as Chinese by analogy with the Jewish matrilineal system - made her second telling contribution on "An Inconvenient Truth" when a map of the world popped up behind Al with all the places he had visited on his lecture tour flashing from it.

"If he's so concerned about global warming, why's he flying around all the time?"

Full marks to the General Studies teacher at Creative Primary School, who'd told them that on a flight from HK to London, each passenger produces a tonne of carbon dioxide. Plus, all sorts of other gases and particles, she tells me.

9:04 am  
Blogger Fumier said...

I produce more than that after a good curry.

10:15 am  
Blogger bobbie said...

Your workplace sounds not dissimilar from the table of aforementioned excitable 7 year olds.

The Asia Pacific members of my company behave not dissimilarly from yours. Unfortunately, there are only about 5 of us.

12:57 pm  
Blogger hugh said...

That's quite a carbon buttprint, fumie.

2:25 am  
Blogger Fumier said...

It takes a big hammer to drive in a big nail, Huge.

7:17 am  

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